I'm Writing a Dating Book(!!)

September 08, 2016

BIG NEWS: my first book

From the moment I began my career, I wanted to cover dating and relationships. I grew up fascinated by the fairytale; so hard to obtain, yet some version of it seemed almost inevitable if you just did your own thing and waited for love to "find you." (When you least expect it...right?)

Reality, as I came to find out with observation and investigation, was an ever-evolving mess of romantic entanglements leading to heartbreak and despair. Dating got more and more confusing with each new rule and listicle that hit the internet. Research on relationships complicated matters even further; headlines said things that did not reflect what women felt. Gender roles changed within couples; breaking-up-and-making-up became the norm; apps hit the scene, causing perfectly reasonable men and women to throw out prospects early and often, never settling down... and I was watching it all unfold very carefully.

Most notably, some of the best catches out there -- amazing women with otherwise full, exciting lives --- were always single and frustrated. What was playing out in real time seemed to flip conventional wisdom on its head. I started to have a slew of revelations about these emerging, shifting dynamics between the sexes, leading to loads of dissatisfied singles -- revelations that inspired the book I am now working on, to be published in early 2018 by Grand Central Life & Style. 

For any woman who's ever been told she's a catch, yet can't seem to catch a break when it comes to guys, hang in there! I can't wait to send answers your way.

Writing this book is a dream come true, for many reasons. On a professional level, it's the opportunity to extensively investigate something I'm deeply passionate about. On a personal level, I've always been interested in love and how to find it -- but increasingly, I've been interested the pursuit of dreams. 
The first dream many little girls have is to find love. But somewhere along the way, they start to have more dreams. Important ones. They find passions. They start careers. They develop ideas. They create systems. Those dreams turn into vision, and they aspire to affect change.

A woman's every dream and aspiration matters; one is no more important than another, because it came first, or it developed with time, or it conforms to some ideal. Sacrificing one love to acheive career success is a form of settling -- and more women contemplate that route than would dare admit to it.

"Settling" is a dirty word when it comes love, and for good reason. There's nothing more comforting and exhilarating than feeling as though you've met someone who is your equal, complement and true partner in life. I don't want any woman, who wants a great career and a supportive relationship, to settle for less-than-fulfilling love.

This book is my manual for the woman who knows she just can't settle, in love or in life. All her dreams can coexist -- even in a dating landscape as confusing as today's. 

More to come. xo. 

If you're a woman or man in your 20s, 30s or 40s and interested in sharing your insights on love, dating and relationships today, don't hesitate to contact me: jen.birch@sbcglobal.net

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